Live Deliberately

Living each day with deep intention.

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Take Agency in Your Life

Agency: (noun) – The office or function of an agent; the capacity or state of acting in a position of power; a person or thing through which power is exerted or an end is acheived; ambassador; “a contract of agency.”

I am overwhelmingly happy to discover that more and more of my peers are starting to manifest their dreams, taking control in their lives and over their circumstances. I love to see friends and colleagues forging their own paths towards happiness and finding their power to make dreams a reality. Nothing pleases me more than when I see someone finding agency in their own life.

It’s all too easy to feel like we are a small pebble in a wide and fast-moving river; to feel like we don’t have control or that control belongs to some other force. It’s easy to feel oppressed in the world, or feel subordinate to an employer or colleagues. It’s easy to find ourselves cowering to, or just accepting what is in our personal lives. Everyday we find outselves subject to someone else’s decisions or overall vision – and feel that we are merely a small pixel in the “bigger picture.” So, how can we take agency in our own lives? 

You have to step up, and step into the role. You have to take (and accept) full responsibility for your life, actions, and circumstances. This is where the real power lies. You are responsible for manifesting your own happiness and well-being. If you know this and you accept this role, you can expect your life to unfold the way in which you would have it. Don’t hand off your agency to someone else, don’t shop it out, don’t give it away, don’t let someone borrow it for a day, and don’t expect someone to step into the role and manifest your dreams. Take agency. Own it. Be proud of it.

Don’t just be here in your life. Be HEREMake a bold choice to be present in your life, be firm in your decisions, accept responsibility for the outcomes, celebrate your wins, and own your faults. No one else can claim this power.

Be the No. 1 Ambassador of your life. Speak up for and act on behalf of you.

Much love. ❤


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The Leap

This time last year, I was doing one of the scariest things I’ve ever done. I left a stable government job in a management position providing me a high salary, paid time off, and health insurance to realize a life-long dream of starting a consulting firm. It was one of the most free-ing but frightening things I’ve ever experienced. I felt a rainbow of emotions over the weeks leading up to handing in my resignation and the weeks following my actual departure… feelings of uncertainty and joy, worry and excitement, relief and possibility.

In the beginning, it took an unspeakable amount of courage and vulnerability on my part and the unwavering support on behalf of my loved-ones to keep me from getting “cold feet.”  It would take faith in myself, sacrifice, a few learning curves, mentorship from a brilliant-minded colleague, friends and family talking me down from my own fears, some late nights in the office, and some moments of sheer pride and joy.

Not everyone could understand my decision, and I think that’s quite normal, but we all have moments when you just know what you need to do, like a gut-instinct that you’re cut out for something greater or different. That moment for me was an almost constant nagging feeling during the last six months of 2016. I found myself in situations where the longing to make the leap tugged harder on my heart. I was presented with scenarios that filled me up with a sense of fulfillment at the mere thought. I was put in unfortunate positions that made me question my current role, my actual impact to the community that I served and the lack of ability to get anything done due to the proverbial government “red tape.”

It has been my experience that such a huge life-transition comes with a lot of highs and lows, and requires certain life skills, such as the ability to allow time for introspection, exercizing emotional intelligence, and creating professional boundaries. I suffered some blow-back from delivering the news of leaving for another opportunity, which made it all the more difficult because I am the type of person who takes on the responsibility of another person’s feelings. Not everyone was happy for me and, in fact, some made my last few weeks quite unbearable. There were moments when I didn’t feel safe in sharing my plans going forward. Unfortunately, delivering the news would lead to my final weeks being some of the most stressful and heart-wrenching moments in my career. I felt an obligation to my staff, my clients and their projects… and in some way, I felt a sense of guilt as though I was giving up on everything I worked hard for. I later learned that my leaving felt like a betrayal, which was not my intention. It took time to come to the realization that it was not my responsibility to carry their burden, because staying meant a betrayal to myself and my own dreams.

The month of January 2018 marks one year since I decided to finally make the leap, eventually handing in my resignation, and transitioning from public-sector (everything I’ve know in the last 15 years of my working life) to private-sector. I can’t say it has all been unicorns and rainbows but it has been fulfilling, exciting, freeing, and much more relaxing that I thought it would be. I’m only one year in, and while I spent my first year building up my business, identifying who I am as a brand and what I can offer my clients, these next few years will be focused on creating more opportunity to generate more joy, income, and quality of life while my girls are still young.

Is there something that you’ve been wanting to do, but you haven’t had the courage to take the leap? I want to hear from you in the comment section below!


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Are you in the arena, or the stands?

When we decide to make some major quality of life changes, there will always be those individuals that don’t understand our motives, and even worse – criticize what they don’t understand. Here’s the thing: unless these critics are down in the arena with us, they can’t possible comprehend or appreciate the what and why of our strategy. Criticism holds no weight from the stands.

I’ve recently decided to make some hefty quality of life changes, starting with my place of employment. When you reach a point of little-to-no fulfillment, and can’t seem to find the joy in what you do, or begin to see people or places as toxic environments – then it’s time to think about making a change.

That’s where I found myself. I knew something had to change, yet I stuck around for about six months longer than I should have. I felt the desire to break free from the toxic and unfulfilling work environment, and to find a more meaningful direction. I didn’t need to change my career path, I just needed to shifted my focus… I needed to narrow-in on exactly what drew me to the profession in the first place. The people. The community. The relationship between the two.

So, I took the dive. Thanks to all of those who were in the arena with me. They got it. They understood my passion, and my drive. They had an appreciation for what I wanted to accomplish, and they stood behind me 110%. The support and encouragement that I received from those in the arena with me – setting out to achieve the same fulfillment and happiness that I sought – held more weight than those of the critics in the stands, who just couldn’t see my vision.

In addition to a more rewarding career, I wanted more quality time with my daughter, flexibility in my schedule, and time to focus on my health, which was taking a very sharp decline and fast. I’m only one month in and there are still some adjustments to be made, and still some fine-tuning to be done – but overall, I find myself in a more consistent and jovial mood. I’ve been able to focus on what’s important in life, and make my career align with my values. Even better, I have more control over my health and stress-levels.

So, stay in that arena, find your teammates, fuel one another and go for the goal. Pay no mind to the critics in the stands for they’re not on the field with you; they have no stake in the game.

(Helpful reminder: Judgement is just a mirror through which people see their own insecurities reflected back at them. When you find someone judging you, it might help to remember that they’re may be feeling insecure about the qualities they may lack, such as the courage to pursue the unknown.)

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Wo(man) on a Mission

So, you’re on a mission… You set your sights on a goal, you get hyped about starting, and stoked to see your dreams become reality. And then life happens and you get distracted, and you wander off the path for a bit. How do pick back up and find the bread crumbs you left for yourself?

I know this all too well… here I go again… I’ve lost sight of my vision many times but I always find myself coming back to it. It happens, we all get distracted. Building a home and planning and preparation can be any easy excuse… But I won’t tolerate my own excuse(s).
How do we hold our vision? How do we stop ourselves from making or allowing excuses for losing our vision?

We enlist support in friends and colleagues. We rally our families and make sure they know what our vision is and the end game, and what it’s going to take to get there. We ask them to hold us accountable. 

How do we motivate and get back up off our tush? Shake off the shame from ditching your dreams (temporarily) and just start somewhere. Find the groove again, pick a point to start and just go. 

And lastly, stay on target! Don’t allow yourself to lose focus for too long, and persist. Because, why? Because you don’t want to look back and regret not chasing your dreams… 


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Chart the Course

Happy New Year! It’s good to be back online! The holidays are such a busy (and hectic) time of year. Seeing (and meeting new) family is always exciting, but now that the thrill of the holiday season has passed, it’s time to settle back into “the grind” and refocus. 

I’m sure some resolutions have been made (and perhaps already broken), but let’s talk about a resolution that isn’t far fetched… Such as turning the focus inward this year. There are so many resolutions made on NYE, but the underlying message of all of those resolutions is, essentially, self improvement. Am I wrong?

Assuming that I’m right, I want to share with my readers a tool that I’ve developed and implemented in my own life. 

Two years ago, I designed a tool that helps me evaluate where I currently am, where I want to be, identify what’s holding me back, and set a plan for getting what I want. Doesn’t that sound delicious?! Getting what you want? It’s not impossible. We start small and work our way towards larger goals. I’ve been using this tool in my own life going on three years now. 
As part of my New Year resolution, I take out a pen and paper and begin to Chart the Course. I’ve used this same tool every January (2013, 2014, and now 2015). Every year, I ask myself what I want, why I want it, if I’m ready for it, and map the plan to get there – and every year, without fail, I’ve attained my goal. 

I’m so excited to share that I – now – have developed the tool enough to begin marketing it and offering it to my followers. 

Chart the Course is an insightful tool designed to inspire action. The tool is successful because it cuts straight to the real meat of any desire and it’s insightful because much of what comes out of it is an eye opener, particularly to the user. 

**Before deciding to take this tool public, I’ve sat with a few of my closest friends to see if it really does hold merit for others as it does for me. I’m pleased to share that it does and I cannot wait to begin posting testimonials. Stay tuned!**

If you’re curious about Chart the Course, and you want to give it a try, click on Contact Me in the top right and send me a message. 

*I’m offering a FREE one-hour Chart the Course session ($75 value) to the FIRST FIVE people who send me a message.*

I look forward to Charting the Course for a thrilling new year!!


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You owe it to yourself…

Round two. I got some feedback from some of you that you liked my post, “it hit home”, “this was exactly what I needed to hear”, “you’re so right”, etc. So, I thought I’d talk about it more today.

Desire. What is it? It’s a longing for something, a strong feeling of wanting something. We all have a desire for something… usually something greater than our current possession, circumstance, career, relationship. Essentially, you feel you deserve better or get a sense that you are made for something bigger or better. Guess what, you are right! Trust your intuition. You’re deserve everything you desire. But are you willing to do what it takes to have it? Are you ready to take action to get there?

Let’s address the steps it takes to get there.

  1. Narrow it down. You can only address and focus on one thing at a time. Figure out what it is you want and ask yourself why  you want it. When you get it, how will life be different for you?
  2. Hold that vision. Do what you need to do to make sure you are reminded of that vision. Put a post it note on your mirror, hang a picture of it… you get the picture. This keeps your priorities on track. Before taking action on any task, ask yourself, “is this going to contribute to the end result I am aiming for?” Ultimately, you want it to result in exactly what you envision. Nothing less. No substitutions.
  3. What is true for you now? Assess what you have here and now that will allow you to immediately begin turning your vision into a reality. What resources do you currently have? (Resources = time, money, equipment, knowledge, people, etc.) How can you reallocate or make better use of those resources?
  4. Which resources do you lack? Set a goal: Create a plan of action to acquire those resources, by priority, in a timeframe that’s comfortable for you.
  5. Are you in the right mind set? Do you have faith in yourself that you can make it happen? If you don’t, then you will fail. Don’t give in to limiting beliefs.
  6. What are you tolerating right now? Shed some of that dead weight. Is it limiting beliefs? Is it settling for less and feeling like it’s going to have to do? Are you making excuses? Is someone else giving you excuses? Do you have the drive and dedication that it will take to manifest your vision?
  7. And finally… GO FOR IT. If you want anything bad enough, you have the ability to make it happen.

I could ramble a ton of cliches at you… Put the petal to the metal. Step on it. Carpe diem. Nike!

You get the picture. No more excuses.

I’d love to hear more from you! What is your vision? What are you tolerating?